I woke up at 4:00am this morning, as per usual, because I need to pee - like all the time. I was a little bleary-eyed and groggy at first, but then I found myself wide awake. Panicked. Because something wasn't quite right.
Because she wasn't moving. At all.
She is always moving around. I mean ALWAYS. Especially when I get up for middle of the night bathroom runs. If I'm lucky she'll just shift around a little. Usually she pokes a heel or elbow or some other miscellaneous part out the side of my stomach for a few minutes before I can fall back asleep. Sometimes she keeps me awake for hours rolling around in my belly. Particularly at the 4:00am pee time.
But this morning, she wasn't moving.
I shifted my belly around. I poked at her. I shined an obscenely bright flashlight on my stomach to get a response. I woke Rob up and made him talk to her. Nothing.
Around 5:00am I was at the hospital. Hysterical. I had driven myself while Rob stayed home with Lucas, and cried the whole way there. Please don't let her be dead. Please don't let her be dead. I couldn't hold it together when I picked up the phone outside labor and delivery. "My baby's not moving," I sobbed.
I cried and signed paperwork and tried to smile when the nurse made small talk with me about Lucas. She went to put the fetal heart monitor on my stomach, and before I could hear the first thump, baby girl rolled.
I cried a little more, out of relief. The nurse told me she was doing just fine. She's not moving because she's getting ready. Because she's dealing with all these contractions. Because I'm finally and officially in active labor.
Since I was at 4cm, the nurse was kind enough to let me go home and labor for a little while. Which is where I am right now. Greedily eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch before they take away all my food. And crying on the dog while I work my way through contractions. He's a pretty fabulous birthing partner while Rob is at work waiting for me to call and tap out. I suspect she'll be here tomorrow, but who knows, maybe it'll be tonight.
More news, pictures and a birth story soon...